Historical records, like those of the ancient city of Corinth, reveal
that in the heart of the Roman Empire, the most technologically
advanced civilization of its day, the sexual values of the first century
were similar to the modern concepts of dating today. Standards were
so skewed that sexual relations with temple prostitutes were not looked
upon as scandalous but considered an appropriate form of worship.
Through the apostle Paul, God taught the Corinthians a better way.
“Flee sexual immorality,” he wrote. “Every sin that a man does is
outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his
own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy
Spirit . . . and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price;
therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s”
(1 Corinthians 6:18-20).
How could Paul dare to address others’ private behavior? He could be
so bold because he understood that God sanctions sexual relations only
within the marriage relationship (Genesis 2:24; Hebrews 13:4). Sexual
relations in any other situation were and are immoral.
Later Paul addressed relationships between members of the opposite
sex even more directly. Urging the brethren to live their lives in a way
pleasing to God (1 Thessalonians 4:1), he wrote:
“This is the will of God, that you should be holy: you must abstain
from fornication; each one of you must learn to gain mastery over his
body, to hallow and honour it, not giving way to lust like the pagans who
know nothing of God; no one must do his fellow-Christian wrong in this
matter, or infringe his rights.
“As we impressed on you before, the Lord punishes all such offences.
For God called us to holiness, not to impurity. Anyone therefore who
flouts these rules is flouting not man but the God who bestows on you
his Holy Spirit” (verses 3-8, Revised English Bible).
The custom and practice of dating—which leads to marriage—should
be conducted with honor. It should not be devalued into an excuse for
sexual gratification. God expects us to enter marriage as virgins. This
approach shows respect for God, our bodies, our futures and the divine
institution of marriage.
God’s way is the best for making marriage work. Sociologists have
found that God’s standard for dating is the one that produces marriages
that last. “After analyzing cohabitation and marriage patterns among
some 13,000 adults, two University of Wisconsin–Madison sociologists have concluded that couples who live together before marriage experience
higher levels of marital conflict and do not communicate as well.
Such couples were less committed to marriage and saw divorce as more
likely than those who had not cohabited prior to marriage”
